a size sexy

crying over fat said...
rev, i have been with the same woman for 15 years. picture this, a size 6 in a sexy thong to an elephant in a not so sexy pair of granny panties. i have thought about asking her to have that surgery, you know, the one where you lose all that weight. please help me with my "FAT" problem!

dear crying,
the same woman for 15 years? i don't know whether to say congratulations or give my condolences. the rrw has never been able to keep the same woman for 15 months, but i think that i may be able to help you my brother!
let me preach on it.....

t...t...t...the first thing that you need to change is your perception of sexy. a skinny little size six is not a turn on, unless you live in some third world country where they marry their 13 year old cousins. trust me my brother, there is nothing sexier than a curvacious queen with a double digit dress size, that looks upstairs, like a dead heat in a zeppelin race. i don't know about you, but the rrw likes his womens to have fun bags that, during an act of circus sex, could possibly cause a concussion. forget smoking a cigarette after sex, the only place you can get the good morphine is at the emergency room. and why in hell would a piece of dental floss in the crack of some skinny little ass be a temptation? unless of course you wanted to play dentist. "excuse me miss, it seems you have a cavity" ha!

n...n...n...now as for the surgery, also known as gastroplasty or gastric bypass. gastroplasty combines the process of stomach stapling and a polypropylene mesh band around the opening of the created pouch. as most of the gastrointestinal tract is left intact, there are few micronutrient deficiencies, and initial weight loss is good. you will be a small chick in relatively no time. yet after long-term observance of gastroplasty, there have been many patients that have regained weight. surgery alone is insufficient - patients must change their lifestyle and eating habits or this procedure can be compromised.
over time, the pouch can dilate and serve as an increased reservoir, along for higher caloric intake and consequent weight gain. also, if your grandma doesn't make your payments on time, the hospital may repossess your surgery. since some patients have also experienced complications such as severe heartburn or erosion of the mesh, and other procedures have had dramatic successes, the popularity of gastroplasty has suffered in the us of a. also it can become quite expenive to buy unitards, to wear under your clothing, to hide all the lose skin. which is a repulsive thought. damn! i hope from now on, when you describe your wife, you will use the adjective 'phat,' because she sounds like a sexy seductress to the rrw!
peace out!